ALWAYS.

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… and never let anyone or anything tell you otherwise.

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Embrace the Unknown

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Many a time I have often wondered,
What is it that I am here for?
Many a time I found myself unanswered
Whether or not to open one door.

In this life of ceaseless wonder
Days and days pass unknowing, uncalled for
But let’s all find beauty on this vagueness,
Let our hearts fly, dream with the wind, and soar!

As we thread to our own paths and ‘roads’
We may sometimes fall prey to traps and blunders
But life has this way of teaching in riddles
For all you know, you’re heading to the right direction!

So hold on dear friend, for we’re not meant to ‘see’ all the way
Take comfort in ‘not knowing’ & soon enough, everything will be okay.

January: So Far

It’s almost 4 in the morning and I have been up since 1. At this cold weather, I woke up in sweat and just couldn’t sleep back. So, as I sniff my way through this post (and not to mention, the days to come), here are a couple of updates (and no, this still does not include promised posts from the last holiday season):

MABUHAY, POPE FRANCIS!
Classes and offices  have been suspended since Thursday of this week because the current head of the Catholic Church came for a visit. For a country who’s population are mostly Christians, it is indeed a pretty great deal. I’ve known for months that the Pope is indeed coming but I couldn’t care less. You see, I’m not a very pious person and I’m not very familiar with him. But then weeks prior to his visit, a documentation at History Channel featured his life and ideals – now, that indeed got me interested. He is one person who has broken the odds. He is no conformist and stands by what he believes is right. Now, that there is a mark of a true leader. Well anyway, that still didn’t spark my interest enough to make me go out of my way and try to see him. Some friends were already fussing about getting tickets and planning where to wait for him but I didn’t even try to entertain the idea of actually trying to brave the streets of Manila just to see him. And of course, I fully regretted this decision when I saw him on live television.
While flipping through channels, I happen to pass by the live telecast and maaaaaan, after a few minutes, I noticed myself on full smile and on the verge of tears. And I was like, ‘WTH. He has done nothing so far but smile, throw jokes at the guards and wave en route Villamor Airbase’ Haha. But, yeah, he had that effect and it was surreal, to think I was just looking through my tube box. Well, from that minute on, I promised myself to try to see him in Rome at least once in my lifetime. He just has this calm, warm and open personality which really draws me in. And, his love for children and intelligent opinion on sensitive issues of course, really meant a whole lot to me. It’s as if he is changing the face of Catholicism. He is not (or does not allow himself to be) strictly boxed by traditional beliefs of the church. He is open to the fact that one does not only need the teachings of the Catholic Church, but can also get from, or learn from the teachings of other religions. He never said or implied that Catholic is the only religion. He believes in one God but not in one, perfect religion. And lastly, when I read about what he said during his flight to Sri Lanka about freedom of speech, it got me sold and blew me away. As what I have always firmly believed in – as with all things, freedom of speech too, is bounded by limits. One is held responsible for the words he/she is throwing out to the world. Because really, not just because you have the freedom, you are free to do whatever you want with it and try to hurt other people. It’s not conformism or being bounded by social stigma, but it’s humanity, people. So anyway, if someone as great as this Pope leads the whole church, then, maybe, having the birthright to Catholicism isn’t so bad after all.

Blast from the Past: Celebrate Life. Celebrate You.

edited welcome tarp

Background grabbed here.

Just a few hours ago, my classmates and I got a chance to conduct a seminar and hold a mini-party for cancer patients at UPHSD-Jonelta hospital. Yes, the preparations were tedious and yes, I was very very stressed out prior to the activity (such is the life of a nitty-gritty OC lady), but it all turned out great. Yes, I repeat, the activity was so successful that it had me all smiles the whole day. It was all worth it – the planning, layouts and of course execution. I’m just so proud we were all able to pull this one off. And maaaaaan, the smiles and laughter from all the survivors a while ago were priceless. It was indeed worth it. Laughter resonated the place throughout the whole activity and everyone enjoyed and had an awesome time. I feel so blessed to have been part of this great cause. I’m also blessed to have professors who believe that being a doctor isn’t solely about the technical part but is mostly about the heart. Heart is the heart of this profession. Hihi #word 😀 Anyway, I’m so thankful and blessed and happy and inspired. ♥

P.S. Event pics to follow soon. 🙂

 

Hello, 2nd Quarter!

So today marks my first day off the young adults category. I know I should be feeling extra special, responsible and mature but I honestly don’t. Hahahaha I’d rather be young-at-heart, thankyouverymuch. Lol

Bye, 1st quarter!

I often do not make birthday wishes but I really hope that this year, I get to accomplish a whole lot more, be more fit and healthy, get to learn and experience more new things, re-experience love, know myself better and just be a better person as a whole. For some reason, I’m pretty excited for this year.

So anyway, I no longer know what to say. I just felt the need to immortalize this day. I feel like it is a feat even if I haven’t actually accomplished something. Hahaha Okay, gonna end this blabbering now. 😀

In other news, I feel so special having to share the same birthdates with one of my most favorite actors. Ha! Happy birthday to you too, Norman Reedus! Cheers! 😀

Darren Forevaaa ❤ ❤ ❤

Thank you, 2014!

Before I start with my yearly round-up, I’d like to take this opportunity to be grateful and thankful for all there is and all there was this past year. It had a mix of highs and lows and yes, it was far from perfect; but hey, I’m pretty proud that I was able to make sound choices. I never regretted a single thing and for what it’s worth, there were a lot of learning and self-discovery. So, here goes…

1.) I’m thankful for the gift of friendship.

Yep. People close to me know I have a pretty active social life. Not because I want to flaunt to the world how much of a sociable being I am, but, in all honesty and sincerity, I have more than a handful of friends I am proud and thankful for. I guess I’m just one of the lucky ones who get acquainted with the most awesome people there is. And this past year is no different. Not only did they stood by me despite everything, I also got to make new ones.Now whoever said that some bridges ought to be burnt in your twenties? 🙂

2.) I’m thankful for the places I got the chance to see.

This year, my wish to travel internationally was granted. I guess, God heard how badly my heart wanted to travel abroad on my 25th year and answered my prayers. I was one with the clouds again and it was beyond awesome. I felt this calm I’ve never felt before. I was in awe the entire time I ventured into new adventures. I had these eager eyes, ready to devour the next new thing that came my way. I was curious with the world and it welcomed me in return. Although it was tiring, and yes, I’m not the best person when it comes to packing (exceeded a few kg on my luggage hahaha), still, it was the best experience thus far. And most importantly, I learned a few things about myself during those times: a.) I’m very much interested in learning about other people’s culture; b.) I love being one with nature; c.) I love food – any food; all food; d.) I have this deeper appreciation of new experiences; and e.) I am passionate for learning. My Malaysia and Singapore adventures definitely topped my 2014’s list. Definitely. I can’t wait to travel more this coming year and the years to come.

3.) I am thankful for family.

I was never close with my immediate family. We used to fight a lot. Partly because I get misunderstood a lot and mostly because I cannot just not speak my voice out. Hahaha Yes, I talk back to my parents and yes, I easily snap. I am to blame as much as they are, I guess. Most of the time, I am in awe as to why they think and act the way they do – far different from I do. I have little tolerance for bullshit and crap and I guess whenever they act or say things far from how I see things, I easily lose my cool. You see, I am very emphatic, intuitive and sensitive. I easily understand things and sometimes, it can be my downfall. Half the time we fight, I wonder, “Why do you think this way?”. I’ve always been one step ahead of every argument – or my mind is, rather. I guess what I’m getting at is, I’m hard-headed, and not tolerant of them, they are not tolerant of me, we often clash not only because of varying opinions, but also because I am firm and stubborn and stand ground on what I hold on is true. Don’t get me wrong, though, we all still fight and clash and all that things normal family have, but this year, I have improved and really made it a point to be more tolerant and understanding of them. I have realized that they are a product of their environment and circumstances as much as I am. They were raised and grew up in a certain way and they only pass on to me what they held on true during their time. I have come to terms with the fact that they may not always do things right, but I know they always want what’s best for me at heart. So I’m happy that this year the house has been more peaceful. And I make it a point that in every argument, instead of plainly talking back, I let them hear my opinion and my side in a calmer manner. I’m struggling and still have not perfected the craft, but I’m getting there. Hahaha

4.) I’m thankful for the opportunity to touch other people’s lives.

This past year, I have had a couple of chances to be part of outreach programs and activities that may not have impacted people’s lives in a grand manner, but helped them in some ways somehow. I’m proud for being part of it, but more so, I’m proud of the people who played major roles in the accomplishment of the activities – my orgmates at the UP thursday club and my highschool classmates. I have always been passionate about helping and I’m just blessed to be part of several activities this year that catered the needs of other people. I hope in the next coming years, I get to touch and effect more lives. 🙂

5.) I’m thankful for all the learning.

I’m not gonna lie, 2014 has been a tough year for me – literally and figuratively. Life just has this way of making you feel inadequate and I felt that in several aspects of my life this past year. It wasn’t much of a struggle but a struggle just the same. I got hurt, felt defeated, got beaten up, but I embrace all of it because I refuse to look at it as experiences that took something from me, but rather, experiences that gave me something – actually, more than something by towing in a thing or two of learning. I am not a master of my medical field as much as not a master of my emotions but I’d like to think that I have come a long way from where I was the previous years. Self-improvement – that’s what’s most important, isn’t it? 🙂 And this year, I can’t wait to get hurt again just so I’d learn things from the experience itself and most importantly, myself. So bring it on! 🙂

6.) I’m thankful for the love.

I’m single – don’t get me wrong. But one does not need to be in a relationship to feel loved and be able to love. I’m a strong believer of that. This past year, I have been a recipient (as well as the provider) of a complex love. It might be twisted in other people’s eyes, but yes, it was love all the same. I am also a strong believer that love, just like any other force, cannot be destroyed – it can only be transformed into another form. And although my love for this particular person cannot forever be erased, I’d like to think that this new form it takes can propel me into being a better person and be the person I was always meant to be. 🙂

I cannot also deny the fact that there have been a couple of people who showed interest here and there, but it didn’t end well. Because for one, I am not ready (as my heart belonged to someone else), and two, I was still healing. But I’m thankful for them just the same because they have made me realize a couple of things and made me know myself even better. Be it love or infatuation or simply interest, I’m thankful for it. Because any form of appreciation has made me boost my morale when I needed it and made me realize my worth even more. It may sound selfish, but I speak only of truth. Through their eyes, I was finally able to see a reflection of myself I thought I lost. And so, I’m very much thankful for that.

7.) I’m thankful for all the blessings

This year, God has blessed me and my family far beyond we ever expected. Aside from the financial and material things, I’m more thankful for the health and success of my parents and siblings. My parents are aging and good health is more than beyond a blessing already. They are both past the line of 50 and I’m  just thankful that they are still able to do things they love. Not everyone is blessed with that and I’m beyond grateful. I pray that this coming year, they still get to be continuously blessed with health and better opportunities for they deserve no less. I pray that my brothers, too, get to be blessed more with wisdom and good health and may they both achieve all their dreams and aspirations in life. 🙂

And lastly, I am thankful for life, but most importantly, I am thankful for all there is in my life right now and I cannot wait to experience more this coming 2015. 🙂

 

I guess that’s it for now. I’m thankful for a whole lot of things and this is just a short list but I’m very much thankful for all these this past year. 2014 has been good to me but I cannot wait to better myself even more this 2015. The past year has been more of a journey than a specific destination and it has been a road to self-discovery and introspection, more than anything. This 2015, I claim that it’ll be the year to make things happen. Yes to more learning, adventures, experiences and success! On with life, on with love! 🙂

 

♥Lots,
edz