YA feels (not a review)

Hi. It’s been a while. I haven’t had the time nor the willingness to write a post for quite a while. IDK, some days I don’t feel like myself. Most days I just lay around the house trying to convince myself that it’s okay to take a break and rest. Only, I don’t feel rested being this bum. My psyche, and everything else has been going haywire causing me to feel needy, clingy, and desperate. In short, I’m quite an emotional mess right now. I haven’t been this much alone with my thoughts that I’ve actually forgotten how it feels like to be able to have the luxury to do the things I’ve always put off in the past due to work.

Snapchat-6837141857718669944Anywaaaaay (that was a totally uncalled for introduction and irrelevant, to say the least), I just finished reading Eleanor and Park by Rainbow Rowell. I remember buying this novel 3 years ago when I was just starting with a brand new life – or that’s how it felt then. New school, new set of friends, new everything, even a new dog. I was just coming out of a bad break-up and was trying to reconnect with myself and all the things that used to like and is starting to like. Anyway, it was at a book fair (the first I’ve ever attended) and I remember being oh so excited roaming around all the book stalls and booths. I’ve always wanted to give Rowell a try. I’ve been hearing rave reviews about her books (at that time for some unfathomable reason, I thought Rowell was a dude haha!). So I got Eleanor and Park and my friend got Attachments. I’m glad I grabbed Eleanor and Park, though. I finished reading attachments on my iPad before but it didn’t do for me. It was not that entertaining for me. That brings me to Eleanor and Park – sure, it did give me something and by something I mean, it did give me feels of some sort emotionally but I don’t think it did quite well too in my opinion. It felt as if the whole time I was reading, I was hoping it could give me more than it was actually giving – like I was trying to prep myself for that major mind-blowing ending or anything somewhere along the story line. But it didn’t happen. Yes, it was sweet and cute but it didn’t give me anything else. I guess it was just geared for a whole different audience. It did give me something, though. There was this pang when Park was being teared up from Eleanor’s absence  but it just wasn’t enough for me, emotionally-wise. I have a breakthrough moment, though. It’s as if I’ve been craving these love stories and love-story-feels these days. I’ve become needy, as I have said but, it isn’t me to be looking for love or whatever it might make me feel; but lately, I’ve been this sort-of-beast eager to devour anything/everything that can give me kilig feels. Haha So anyway, that’s it for now and my sort-of-and-not-so-sort-of-take on Eleanor and Park. Haha I’ll leave you with this: